Okay, sorry. I know it's bee a while since we've updated, but first I got sick, and then Righty went through rehab, and then Britney had this whole Mexico fiasco, which I'm going to tell you about later in this entry.
But first: To our fans, sadly Britney did not win a Grammy, although she was nominated for both best female pop vocal and best pop vocal album. Fortunately, neither did that skank "best new artist of 1999" Christina Aguilera. If I had arms I would smack Faith Hill.
Well, anyway, about a month ago, Britney was at a Dairy Queen in El Paso, signing autographs and raising money for Justin Timberlake's foundation for music in schools or saving whales or the ozone or something. To be honest whenever that guy comes over, I kind of zone out. Truth be told, he kind of weirds me out. He's a little, shall we say, eccentric, and while I don't have a problem with the eyeliner, the constant shrieking gets on my nerves. But I don't hate him as much as Righty does. He has his good points. For example, he's very good at... well... nevermind.
Anyway, Britney and Justin were signing autographs and raising money and publicity and all that, when all of a sudden, this man in a leather vest and a motorcycle helmet comes in with a briefcase full of money and a message that Justin is needed in Tijuana. So we follow him in Britney's Dune Buggy, and make a long story short, four gun shots and eight-hundred pounds of crack-cocaine later, we end up in a Mexican jail cell. Now, I don't want to go into details, but Britney was able to convince the guard to let us go with a little persuasion, and some reluctant help from Righty and myself. With a stolen gun and a hostage named Tito Justin jacked the first bus we saw back to LA, and before you could say "federal investigation", we were on a plane to Orlando, safe and sound.
In other news, Britney got a yummy new pair of pants the other day.
That's all. Keep requesting Britney's songs on your local radio station and Total TRL Live!